Fake Pregnancy Test

Fake can be funny! Imagine this scenario: after an intimate bout with your girlfriend, you're confronted with an unpleasant case of condom failure. To play it safe, you offer to get her a home pregancy test, which, to her dismay, comes up positive. At the doorstep of the abortion clinic, you turn to meet her tear-drenched eyes, smile wide, and say...

April Fools! That was a Fakenewspapers.com Fake Pregnancy Test, guaranteed positive results every time! And only $17.95!

What a way to brigthen a gal's day.

Moscow Fake Capital of the World?

This LA Times article describes a Moscow travel agency that will, for a moderate fee, give you a fake vacation.

"If the customer is an errant husband who wants his wife to believe he's on a fishing trip, Persey offers not just photos of him on the river, but a cellphone with a distant number, a lodge that if anyone calls will swear the husband is checked in but not available, and a few dead fish on ice."

One Siberian gas station proprietor even paid $2000 for the company to help him convince his friends that he visited the moon.

The article also discusses Russia's thriving counterfeit industry, an industry accounting for 50% of all goods sold in Russia, according to officials.

Charitable No, But Fashionable Yes!

Lance Armstrong's
Livestrong charity band

Livestrong bands, the $1 yellow rubber bracelets sold to support and raise awareness for Lance Armstrong's cancer survivor charity, have become completely devoid of humanitarian meaning. They do, however, appear on the wrist of every preteen with a modicum of trendiness, and are the primary fixture of a huge fashion craze.

Like you'd expect of any easily manufactured product with a high profit margin, Livestrong bands are being forged. This alone is unsurprising and hardly blogworthy.

Knock-off "Support a Cure" bands

Several weeks ago, while shopping for marigold seeds at Longs Drugs, I came across a hanging sales display of what looked like Livestrong bands. But these were in fact generically branded "Support A Cure" bands, which ironically had no indication of supporting any charity whatsoever. My initial shock that Longs would sell so unscrupulous a product was quickly sidelined when I saw the price tag. At $1.99, these knock-off non-charity bands cost twice as much as the genuine article.

Such is the price of beauty, no?

Phony Phone Calls

With the spread of cell phones, a new phenomenon has emerged in which phones are used to communicate not with the person on the other end of the line, but to communitcate with whoever is in earshot of the caller. This article describes how many people pretend to make phone calls in order to communicate a variety of messages to their surrounding environment.

Some stage calls to avoid contact, whether with neighbors or panhandlers, co-workers or supervisors, Greenpeace canvassers or Girl Scouts. Some do it to impress those within earshot, others so they don't look lonely. Men talk to their handsets while they're checking out women. Women converse with the air to avert unwanted approaches by men.

The author doesn't reach to make any generalizations about this behavior, but would I be wrong to opine that it's a largely antisocial one?

Something Sounds Fishy

While "the one that got away" might seem like a harmless, if not entirely truthful, fish story, this article tells the accounts of some not-so-innocuous ones.

One British fisherman, after raising a record-breaking trout in captivity and then passing it off as wild for eight years, had this to say about his indiscretion: "[It] destroyed me, my marriage and everything I ever wanted. I felt so guilty. Not a week went by without me thinking about it."

Read this and other accounts of deception and betrayal on the water. Just don't get hooked.

Phony Floor, Stove Aid Papal Selection

The stove traditionally used at
the Sistine Chapel to burn ballots

​

The cardinals will convene at the Sistine Chapel on Monday to select a new pope. Following tradition, their ballots will be burned in a stove within the church. If white smoke comes out, it signals that a new pope has been chosen, while black smoke signifies that a conclusion hasn't yet been reached. But to avoid the possibility of meaningless gray smoke the Vatican has built a technological solution. In fact, Monday's stove trick will be all smoke and mirrors:

The stove, in fact, is a two-part device: one a cast-iron chamber where the ballots are burned and the other a container where canisters of chemicals are inserted to make the smoke white or black. The container has a big red "start" button and an electric blower to ensure the smoke rises from the chimney.

This Guardian article goes on to show that the stove won't be the only trickery at the upcoming historical event. The cardinals will conduct their deliberations atop a raised false floor, beneath which is housed electronic jamming devices to prevent spying.

Can Forged Fax Free Felon?

A Louisiana woman was arrested after sending a forged fax that would have released her boyfriend from jail. The kicker? It worked once before:

Sheriff George H. Payne Jr. praised his security and records staff for catching the counterfeit documents. Payne said the couple used the same technique to obtain Dugan's unauthorized release from a St. Martinsville, La., parish jail on charges of probation violation.

"She used computer-generated copies of official paperwork stating that a detainer placed on Dugan was no longer valid," said Payne.